Turning to the 23!!
In one word, its weird. I had my 23rd birthday some days back. I went home for 2 days with my cousins. My going ticket had 22 as my age and the return one had 23. I have lived 23 years of my life and I felt old. This b'day was not as usual ones. I was not very excited or not very expecting. Though my family gave me a surprise celebration at 12 midnight, my brothers me dirty with cake. I knew they were planning all this but then too I gave them the perfect “Oh I am so glad you did that” look :P. The next day I had a lot of home made food by dearest mom, dad gave a small party at night at a traditional rajasthani restaurant. I also witnessed a gazal nite there and had a song dedicated to me by lovable dad. I boarded my train back to delhi at around 2 am after all this. All of people I expected to wish, wished me. So all in all, it was nicer than I expected.
But then too, God I am 23 now. Its just this tag that dreads me and also the attitude of people around me. My parents feel that I am growing up and should be serious about life. They want to know what I am planning next, how long I want to do the job, what after it, after how many years will I marry someone. I have no data to fill in their answers. I am not thinking at all about it. A batch mate and few school friends got married this year, ohh that still freaks me out.
Anyway besides these, I feel more or less the same. I am still the same kid at heart. I still worry about meaningless things. I still love to live in my dreams. I have no whereabouts of future, I am all living in present. I still crave for dark chocolates and other related stuff. I still blindly believe in friendship turning to love and then into a long term companionship. I am focussed to the work I like and dream about making big in life someday. Shopping for clothes, footwear , accessories and hairdos still drive me crazy and never ends. I still can't stay at my home for too long. Database of newer novels is on steep increase, no hold here too. So more or less my faiths and likes are the same what they were 4-5 years back when I actually started framing my thoughts.
SO what it is that dreads me at 23. I guess its only the number and expectations of people around me to do certain things in certain manner for which i really dont feel ready at the moment.
In one word, its weird. I had my 23rd birthday some days back. I went home for 2 days with my cousins. My going ticket had 22 as my age and the return one had 23. I have lived 23 years of my life and I felt old. This b'day was not as usual ones. I was not very excited or not very expecting. Though my family gave me a surprise celebration at 12 midnight, my brothers me dirty with cake. I knew they were planning all this but then too I gave them the perfect “Oh I am so glad you did that” look :P. The next day I had a lot of home made food by dearest mom, dad gave a small party at night at a traditional rajasthani restaurant. I also witnessed a gazal nite there and had a song dedicated to me by lovable dad. I boarded my train back to delhi at around 2 am after all this. All of people I expected to wish, wished me. So all in all, it was nicer than I expected.
But then too, God I am 23 now. Its just this tag that dreads me and also the attitude of people around me. My parents feel that I am growing up and should be serious about life. They want to know what I am planning next, how long I want to do the job, what after it, after how many years will I marry someone. I have no data to fill in their answers. I am not thinking at all about it. A batch mate and few school friends got married this year, ohh that still freaks me out.
Anyway besides these, I feel more or less the same. I am still the same kid at heart. I still worry about meaningless things. I still love to live in my dreams. I have no whereabouts of future, I am all living in present. I still crave for dark chocolates and other related stuff. I still blindly believe in friendship turning to love and then into a long term companionship. I am focussed to the work I like and dream about making big in life someday. Shopping for clothes, footwear , accessories and hairdos still drive me crazy and never ends. I still can't stay at my home for too long. Database of newer novels is on steep increase, no hold here too. So more or less my faiths and likes are the same what they were 4-5 years back when I actually started framing my thoughts.
SO what it is that dreads me at 23. I guess its only the number and expectations of people around me to do certain things in certain manner for which i really dont feel ready at the moment.
4 comments:
This is one of the better "it's my birthday" posts I've read.
Good luck for everything you have planned!
-doc.
thnkus Doc!!
ro mat. stay urself. jab tak vibha ke do bete nahi ho jate tujhe shadi karne ki jaldi nahi hai...:p
@taru
hehe main to tension free hi hoon !!
Post a Comment